Let’s say me and my friend Steve are going to meet down at the local bar everynight at 5:00 p.m. for the next 90 days in a row. Our goal is to get drunk. But all we do is sit there and look at the bottles lining the wall behind the bartender. We talk about how drunk we’re going to get when we lift that bottle up to our mouths and feel that warm whiskey running down our throats and into our blood. But again, all we do is talk about it. We don’t ask the bartender to help us or pour us anything, all we do is talk. Then we wonder why we’re not getting drunk. Must be the bartenders fault of course, isn’t that his job… to get us drunk?
OK, now say I’ve been getting in trouble with the law for awhile now. A few DUI’s or whatever, let’s just say that drinking alcohol has really gotten me into a lot of trouble. People keep telling me I should go to Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or a treatment program for my problem. Finally I decide to do something about it, at least to get everyone off my back. Then I hear the people in AA and the treatment center suggesting I go to 90 AA meetings in 90 days. So I do that, I go to 90 meetings in 90 days. I sit there and listen to everyone talking about their issues and how great or terrible their life is. I come out of a few meetings feeling something, maybe if anything I’ve forgotten about all my problems for an hour.
But all I do is listen to what everyone is saying. I take no action. I don’t do anything they suggest, like get a sponsor and work the steps. Consequently, I do not get the desired effect I am seeking, like serenity and inner peace.
It is possible to come out of AA meetings feeling, but that is different than healing. If you truly are an alcoholic like me, than we need to find some healing. Feeling only lasts for so long, then we’re drunk again. What we really need is some real healing that comes with truly working a recovery program. You see, the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous are like the bottles on the shelf behind the bartender. If we do not take the action which will get us the desired results, we’re not going to get better.
The story about the two guys, the bar, and 90 meetings and 90 days was inspired by an AA speaker I heard by the name of Giuseppe. I just wanted people to know I did not come up with that brilliant analogy by myself. Actually, when you think about it, most of the things we learn are from someone else right? So why not go get something from someone who has something you want? Like true recovery.
Like the saying goes, “if you want something you’ve never had, you must do something you’ve never done.” For me, that something was surrender and ask for help.
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